The Official Writing Challenge
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An allegory! It reminds me a lot of "Pilgrim's Progress" or "Hind's Feet in High Places." I like your names.
Well written and good message.
I agree with Yvonne. Very nicely done.
I agree with Yvonne, reminds me of Pilgrim's Progress!

Good work.

May God bless.

Dan Blankenship

What an awesome take on the subject Helen and you pulled it off very well! Good job with dialogue, atmosphere and message. You go girl!
A beautiful allegory. Wonderful use of characters, and their counterparts. Very nice. :)
I saw your querie on "Throw A Brick." I am sure you do not have to be a club 500 to post a link. Marlene has just helped me do it. So I am passing on the information she gave me. (After my comment on your story).

As for your story, it was very good. You must have at one time in your life read "Pilgim's Progress." This little allegory sounded like a modern version of that. If you want to know more about Pilgrim's Progress, and how you can read it on line, write me....Oh, and by the way, what are you doing in Beginners category? This story, in my opinion, tells me you should be away past "Beginners"...Helen

To Post A Story Link:

1. Open your story page, copy the URL at the top of the page (click
on the [F} next to the www. info)
2. Go to the hinting page and open a post
3. Click on the URL button (at the top, right of the upper box)
4. add an = so it looks like this [URL=] (no spaces)
5. Paste the copied URL after the =
6. Type the title of your story between the
[URL=http:www.xxxxxxxxxx123456] The Title of Your Story [/URL]
7. Click "submit"

I hope this works for you. Put it in the way you think is correct,
then go to preview and see if it comes up in the blue letters. If it
does, then you're ok, so submit. : )

A lovely parable with a lesson for all of us. Nicely done.
This is far better than your placement indicates. You have a real flare for imaginative pieces. This one would make a good children's book for mid-school ages. Sort of a prep for Pilgrim's Progress.