The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/17/09
I found this to be a funny and touching little story. It was easy to picture the story taking place.
09/18/09
Exactly as you say- an eye view! How lovely. I felt endeared to the retiree just reading your story.
It was as if you were describing a day in my dad's life! Good writing. The last line felt slightly out of place, maybe build it up a bit more? Overall, a nice entry :-)