The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Very touching and engaging; held my attention throughout. Good job!
good story i loved the scene you set with the pancakes and the red bike and your mum. maybe it would have been good if you could have added your dad into that morning scene somehow as it would have made him more of a reality in that part of the story before describing the feelings of loss....
vivid word pictures though and added in with the music does describe that lost era.
I like the way you integrated the red tricycle throughout the story.

I lost my dad a few years ago and I long for the day I will be reunited with him.
Congratulations for ranking 14th in level one!
This is a touching piece. Mom died 17 years ago and I still miss her every day.