The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/26/15
Good job with the topic and your approach. WEll done.

God bless~
11/29/15
It is true that patience can never be mastered. I struggle with it on a daily basis.
I like the points you made. I often say I'm not very patient, but it is something I can change. The main red ink I have, is you don't need to use the topic word for it to be on topic. You said people grate me, but to my ears it sounded odd. You still would have been as much on topic if you used irritated. The way you had it, I pictured people rubbing you against a big cheese grater. I enjoyed your ending. Jesus is the same. He loves us through our changes as we strive to be more like him. Nice job.