The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
An interesting read. I was surprised at how you brought Jesus into the story. I would also suggest always reading through your writings a couple of times before submitting. I have found by doing this myself I find any misspelled words or left out words. I discovered some in this writing. Keep up the good work!
You are doing great work for the Kingdom, keep it up. Try to work some dialogue into your writing in order to liven it up even more.
I too thought this was an interesting story. It would have been nice to see you spice it up, like Graham suggested, with a little dialogue. Put some mystery, or suspense in it.

You did a good job. Keep writing. God bless
Well done!
I really enjoyed this entire piece.