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The FaithWriters Writing Challenge and contest for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Great message! Nicely written and told. Thanks
God bless~
Such a lovely story. I could feel Ron's frustration as well as his love for his wife. I love how Jess offered to help in order to give Ron a break. Such sacrifice and care for others. A great message here.

God bless!
I thought your story was a beautifully, poignant look into what many spouses face each day.
Such an interesting take on the topic too. Well done!
Oh, this is good. I love it. I love the "cup" plan. Creative too. :)
Oh, what a sweet but sad story! You did a good job with the characterizations and dialogue. Blessings on your writing!
I love this story. You did such a great job of developing the characters; each one unique and special. The topic was covered in a unique and creative way that left me with a smile.

The main red ink I have is the POV shift. Since the story was told from Ron's perspective, the reader can only know what Ron sees, feels, or hears so when his wife set out while he was snoring the POV shifted. Then again when it showed the thoughts of the the neighbor and May herself. This is a great story and what makes it great is knowing what was in the other's heads. Perhaps if once Ron snored if you had put a line of stars like this*** and then told it from Jess' POV you would still have the intensity of the characters.

This POV shift is something I just started working on in my stories. if my brain hadn't been programmed to try to prevent myself from doing it, I'd never had noticed because your story kept me so engrossed. I think you did an excellent job of showing a day in the life. It is important to bring an awareness to Alzheimer's. I would guess that you have experienced this disease firsthand because of your outstanding details. My heart hurts for you if that is true but I'm also impressed with your courage to share a story with the world. It will touch countless people in ways you may never imagine. I'm honored to have read it.
Beautifully and creatively told, with a very practical hint thrown in, all wrapped in love without sliding into a sermonic style. Well-deserved HC, or even higher.
Sad but sweet... a beautiful story. Two of my daughters work with elderly folk with similar challenges at a local long term care facility. They have told us a few stories, all anonymous of course. Congratulations on your HC!