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The FaithWriters Writing Challenge and contest for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Interesting perspective here, and a harrowing look into the workings of madness. Continue to work and revise this piece - sometimes less is more; too many descriptive words can bog the reader down, and if you choose the right ones you won't need more for effect. Keep writing! And don't forget to check out the free online writing classes on Faithwriters.
I'm not sure how to react to this story. Is it a lament that your mc didn't do enough for the mother and son? Is it a recounting of a terrible experience that she was caught in the middle of? A little of both?

Don't get me wrong, I like not knowing. I like having to think it through and I like the authenticity of feeling involved. I believe that these would be the thoughts of someone who had to live through something like this.

It was very intriguing to read. Thanks for sharing it with us.
What a terrible picture of life without God you painted here!
I'm glad you escaped to new life and love.
What a terrible picture of life without God you painted here!
I'm glad you escaped to new life and love.
This was an extremely difficult piece to write. I was emotionally overwrought and it shows clearly here. It is embellished misaligned prose, as I originally struggled to write it in free verse. It is and it isn't non-fiction, as I wrote what I imagined occurred in this dark trial of terror for my first husband and his mother. I accidentally hit "send" as soon as I transferred it from my Word document, so the mistakes are glaring. Kinda fits somehow.
I really like the emotion. I could feel it deeply. One thing to help you not submit before you're ready - I don't title my piece or put the level on until I'm all ready to submit it. I've looked it over; made any changes...when all that is done, that's when I put in the title and level. If you accidentally hit submit before any of that's in, it won't go on. A clever little trick I learned on accident. :)
Part of every art piece is the artist's soul. Overlooking the mistakes, this is a wonderful expression of you heart agonizing over life's unpredictable circumstances.

I loved it and felt every agonizing moment.

It is a winner to me.
Wow, that was raw and gripping. It felt like a snapshot into the characters' souls. It can be quite frightening to come face to face with the brokenness of our human nature.
Your recollection of the observation of their torment is gripping and horrible.

The enemy of our souls uses horrific methods to keep people bound.

Many times the Light is only sought through depths of darkness.