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The FaithWriters Writing Challenge and contest for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 461 times

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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/16/16
Maybe the overload of boxes on board the ship represented the overload of clothing in her wardrobe?! Just two red pen critiques: there was a name change in there - Michelle went to Renee once and also for consistencies sake, the captain could have kept to you, ye or ya. Otherwise, good story.
I liked this. I think you did a nice job of developing the characters. The captain seemed to change a bit. At first his words weren't wasted. He just said what needed saying, but then his dialog became longer and more formal. I think I preferred the more rustic captain. I did see the metaphor in this piece and thought it quite clever. Don't we all find ourselves from time to time, facilities g a storm, laden with baggage. Great job.
Facing a storm, not facilitating. (grrr spell check). ;)
10/20/16
Congratulations on 3rd place in Editors Choice, and 1st place in the Advanced level. Well written and you had me visually stimulated troughout. Very nice job indeed. Happy dancing.
10/20/16
What a great entry! I really enjoyed it. Congratulations
10/20/16
Congratulations, Francie, on your well deserved 3rd place EC award. I hope this means you're moving up to the Masters.

I enjoyed the description and development of the characters.
10/20/16
Congratulations on your EC for a very descriptive entry. It recalled my deep-sea fishing friends who could look at the sky and predict what the next day's weather would be. Well done.
10/20/16
Congratulations on your EC for a very descriptive entry. It recalled my deep-sea fishing friends who could look at the sky and predict what the next day's weather would be. Well done.
11/15/16
You drew fabulously vivid word pictures. Really enjoyed your tale and liked how you left its conclusion up to the reader. Well done and congratulations on your win.
01/02/17
Hmm, what was His answer? Loved the story, good job.