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The FaithWriters Writing Challenge and contest for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Loved the symbolism and your beautifully poetic phrasing.
I'm so glad this is an essay and not a poem, although that would be a nice exercise -- try this as a poem. Then turn it back into an essay. I'll bet you'd end up with a tighter, more focused piece.
Your metaphors are perfect and you develop them nicely but there are too many thoughts and themes here vying for my attention. I hsve the same problem when I write essays (that often end up as blogs). I run them by my writing buddy and she helps me develp a tighter focus.
Make that ending pop by aiming this piece more clearly in that direction. A very thoughtful piece.
This is a brilliant piece of writing. The beginning made me curious and the ending was profound. You covered the topic in a creative way.

For me personally, I'm not sure you needed to add the twinkle part. You did such an outstanding job withyour analogy that I can't imagine anyone not getting the message. Although people haven't been able to understand my message in my story. There's a fine line between overexplaining for those who don't get it and allowing the story to speak for itself. You straddled that line like a Master!

Now the song, Bullfrogs and Butterflies is stuck in my head!
Beautiful writing. You have a real way with words.

I kept waiting for the massive array of colorful butterflies to take flight! With the build up of the overwhelming number of caterpillars, I thought surely it would go to the wonder of the butterflies fluttering about in all their glory. Maybe that was just me. :)

I have to say, I started to lose a little bit of interest by the end, maybe because of what another reviewer mentioned about so many thoughts and themes.

I do love how your words flow so beautifully. Wonderful piece of writing.
Wow- this was filled with a lot of imagery and metaphors and everything in between. Nice job!

I enjoyed it - God bless~
The imagery is beautiful and leaves a picture in the readers mind of each situation. Poetic and endearing.
You showed a very interesting comparison! I, too, had a diary with a key as a child. (I think it's still in a box in the attic.)

Nearer the end, your thoughts began to repeat themselves. "Will blogs go the way of butterflies and frogs?"
Although the thought of being changed at the coming of Christ goes with your theme, you barely mentioned it without explanation. I hoped you could have elaborated more on it.

Great imagery and analogies! Keep it up!
I enjoyed your skillful word pictures as you drew me in to the parallels you outlined. It looks as though you ran out of words to fully develop the twinkle part, but it was a stimulating read. Thanks from Downunder.