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The FaithWriters Writing Challenge and contest for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This is a masterful piece of writing with a lot of depth. You have revealed the reason for what is happening gradually and built up the tension well. Your use of language is beautiful and your story very moving. Very well done!
This is such an intense piece. The feelings and pain of the MC was palpable. The character has such a sense of pain, I want to reach through and comfort him. I do wonder if everyone will get the Native American references as they were subtle but I also understand the word count limits you. This MC is screaming for more space to tell his story. I do hope you will consider expanding this as it is awesome and leaves me wanting to read more and more.
Engaging! Love the dialogue and redemption story. I agree with Shann in that these characters should be expanded! Kind of reminds me of the book,
'The Same Kind of Different'.
Pray about it and see if He doesn't want you to go further with this story! Great job!
Exceptional. Though I found it painful to read, if it was a book I couldn't put it down. Very well written with such emotional charges. Great Job.
I couldn't agree more with the comments that your piece makes one want to know more of this powerful story, this incredible truth of God's colors being one. I got and loved your "Native American" references, however, their history has always had a special place in my heart. I love the way this piece ends, but as you mention with the Lord's endings being His beginnings, your ending here should serve as a beginning for your next piece... Like someone has already mentioned, pray about it. That is the best advice anyone could give. This was not an easy read but a deeply meaningful one. Thank you for writing it.Your language and dialogue in the right places were spot on.
I also loved how splash turned to splat -- that was a stroke of genius for "splats" stick better than "splashes" do.
Your entry was mesmerizing. A unique tapestry of words and blending of culture. Superbly written with a perfect ending!
Wow. That's all I can say. This piece is powerful.
Painfully rivetting. I agree - this is a book in the making.
Artful story containing artful truth! :) You painted a great picture with your words! I loved how each color meant something meaningful to your MC, and I appreciated the interaction between the MC and the black man. Of course, the ending was superb! :)
This is excellent. The pain of the MC is felt, deeply felt. The ending is moving. And it begs for more to be told. I hope you are planning to develop your MC and the old black man further, because I see an interesting story developing between them.
This was so powerful and entertaining at once. I really thought it had a profound ending, with meaning beyond our understanding.

Thanks. God bless~
CONGRATULATIONS on your E.C. win for this most-excellent piece! WAY TO WRITE!! :)
Fourth over all and a 3rd placing in your level, I am thrilled for you, but mostly for God's kingdom, for I believe this piece has the potential to plant many seeds. Blessing of His joy!
Wow, what a creative story and such a great message t the end. Well worth the read. Congrats on coming in 4th.
Masterfully written, Sarah. I'm thankful there was someone to offer him Hope. Super congrats on your Editor's Choice award!
Congratulations on your EC. Well done!
This story does beg to be expanded. Perhaps it will be a book in the hands of Native American young people looking for purpose if they haven't already found it. Powerful. Congratulations on your EC.