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The FaithWriters Writing Challenge and contest for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 626 times

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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/05/14
Interesting story...and prayer is always the answer. Well done.
Beautiful message.

God bless~
09/07/14
A fascinating story and innovative take on the topic. I would like to read the next chapter in Sid's journey of discovery. Your writing is very engaging. I did notice that your changed Sid's voice from the third person to the first person in the last third of the story - easily done. But, apart from that, very well done.
09/07/14
I like this.

In one way I felt it ended too quickly. Like there should be more to the encounter between the woman and the MC, but in a way I felt it was just right, as neither wanted to share much. Maybe you could have given a little more insight into the MC's struggle here? It really does work the way you have it, though.

Nice job. I liked this, and the explanation between the odd "ritual" the woman had.
Mesmerizing! Never a dull moment when I see your name in the bricks!
09/08/14
Wow for descriptive style and for absorbing content. I was also thrown slightly by the shift to first person, but the energy kept coming.
Wow, I have been in a similar place before, searching for answers... "Why did friends lie? Why did church leaders practice questionable ethics? What happened to love one another?" Yeah. That hit very close to home for me.

I too was a little confused by the switch from third person to first. But it didn't detract from the ending message, which I found very powerful.
Very interesting.

What a blessing that God meets us when we wander off to find ourselves.

Yes, the swapping from third to first person was a little confusing but it's so easy to do when you're writing and are putting your heart into your story and yourself in the place of your MC.

Well done. I like the mystery of the teacup in the middle of the jungle.

I'm curious, (and probably just slow to catch on) what was the significance of the seven coffee beans?
09/10/14
You had me from the opening line of "gone to look for myself..." Very funny!

The rest of the story took a more serious tone, but it was equally enthralling. I think there was a lot more to this story than the 750 word limit would reasonably allow, and I, like most of the other commenters, would love to hear the rest.

Great job!
09/10/14
I enjoyed your entry but don't 'get' what your MC found. Sorry...